Well, this wekend has been somewhat more relaxed. I got to sleep in today (SO EXCITED!), and have spent the rest of it helping my mom clean. I was due for a break so I decided, hey, I'll blog.
We have had our first day of cooling off here (SO EXCITED...again!). Fall is coming, but we're probably in for some more hot days. I love fall, but I only want it to be cold from Halloween to New Years. I can be miserable when it gets in the 40s and sometimes 30s in Jan. and Feb.
As I was cleaning today, I realized just how busy my family's lives have gotten. I've been remininscing over past times when we were together more, and life just seemed calmer. I do miss those times. I can get really overwhelmed at times by how much my younger brother and sister have grown. He's a junior and she's in 5th grade. He does varsity football and baseball, and she does gymnastics and softball. All extra times are mostly spent at games or practice. I spend most of my day at school in another town ( I still live with my parents because they love me and I have no time for a job because of 16 hours of school). Needless to say, it's hard finding a time when we are all at the house at the same time and not asleep.
How come it seems that the further on you get in life, the more hectic it gets? It seems to never slow down lately. And how come it always is that we come to wish that we could only go back in time and enjoy those times together like we should have then? Most times, we (or I) wish that I could go back to those time with the knowledge that I have now. Hug my granny and grandaddy again that are now gone. Be more kind to my brother and sister. Help my mom and dad more. Follow Christ more. Yet, He wants us to live in the now. There is nothing that we can do that can redo all the things of the past. But we can live in the present and work for Him.
The present is not always happy or comfortable, though. Lately I have just seemed so out of sorts with the present. I'm happy with where I am. But, I can always strengthen my relationship with Him, and not exactly sure how He wants to use me in the future. Prayers are welcome. But the kind of out of sorts that I mean is sometimes I just don't feel like I ...belong I believe would be the best word. Sometimes I just get the feeling that there is just so much more out there that I have no clue about, and I think this is when God gives me a glimpse of a feeling of heaven. Ever feel like that? When that happens, I just know without a doubt that, as much as I love it here, this place is definitely not my home. My home is with Him, and I won't ever feel like I completely belong until I get there. Not saying that I want to leave this earth anytime soon, because I feel like He can still use me, but take me on my word when I say that I will not mind when He decides my time is up (still want to say that I hope it's not anytime soon though!). I honestly find myself longing for the day when I won't have to worry anymore (which I can't even imagine!), or cry or sorrow. I'll be with my Savior and all my friends and family. And we'll be able to stay together forever without getting on each others nerves(again, hard to imagine). I can't wait until all of us siestas are up there together getting to meet up together and praise our Lord.
Love you girls alot!
~Sarah
Boxing on Sundays
-
This is a post for my imaginary pastor's wife friends in cyberspace. I
don't know your names or faces but I feel like I know you. And you know me.
Some day...
7 years ago
1 comments:
i think that is how we were made to feel. That we are not of this world. that we DON"T belong..while we still have to be relevant in this world, it isn't where we were made to yearn for. And yes, it does seem like the more we learn, the more we regret or feel some sense to "right" the wrongs of our pasts. But just like Hosea 6:2 says LET US KNOW; LET US PRESS ON TO KNOW THE LORD... we just gotta keep movin on with God!
Post a Comment